


Choices

by StarvingLunatic



Category: Kim Possible (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Beginnings, College, Drama, F/F, Female Character of Color, Homophobia, Lesbian Character, Novella, Origin Story, Rare Pairings, Romance, Wordcount: 10.000-30.000, Wordcount: Over 20.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-03-01
Updated: 2007-03-07
Packaged: 2018-07-25 10:52:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 22,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7529869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarvingLunatic/pseuds/StarvingLunatic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Before becoming a super villainess, a teenage Shego learns some lessons that the choices you make can alter your life drastically, irreversibly, and not for the better sometimes. Pairing: Shego and Miss Kyoko.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t own these characters; Disney does.
> 
> This fic is based on the song [_Street Symphony_ (the remix)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nc3W4mfbtNo) by Monica. As you might guess, I don’t own the song either.

“ _I love you, baby girl, but don’t make me choose…”_ the opening line of _Street Symphony_ the remix.

Choices

Part: One

“It’s either leave her or leave the team.”

Hego’s voice was as strong as the rest of him and seemed to boom in the Go Tower conference room. He thought he had her with his wretched ultimatum. She could see it in his eyes — cold as ice, just as strong and uncaring as his tone. He was unmoved, but then again, so was she, even as his words bounced off the steel walls and echoed back into her, bombarding her insides.

The commanding blue dolt had called an “emergency team meeting,” making sure they were all present, accounted for, and comfortable before going in the reasons for the meeting and hitting her with that demanding proposal. Her body burned with fury while he talked, like she had done something so horrible, so unforgiving. By the time he got to his last sentence, she was on her feet from outrage, hitting their circular conference table.

Her face was bright with indignation. She felt like her powers might actually shoot out of her nose as she huffed. The younger brothers looked on from their seats at the circular table, wide-eyed, almost in horror. This was a train wreck and it was impossible to turn away. The color had drained from their faces, as if they feared for someone’s life.

The eldest folded his arms across his thick chest and glared at her rather smugly. He obviously thought he had shamed her. He believed he had embarrassed her in front of their younger brothers and she would have to do what he wanted to save what little respect they had left her for, even though they would never look at her the same again. _Yeah, he thinks he has me_. She frowned because he almost did have her.

There was no way Shego could walk out on them. Hego seemed to think that, anyway, especially not for the wrong thing. They were family, the only family that they had left, the only thing they really had at all, so he was beyond certain she would remain with them.

It would let their younger brothers down if she left and Shego tried to do right by them whenever she could, even if she yelled at them often. She always wanted the best for the little guys. Plus, they were superheroes and superheroes always did the right thing. So, Hego was certain she would do the right thing and stay with them.

Of course, thanks to his idiocy he did not see how this could cut both ways. He had stolen her privacy from her, but also robbed her of their brothers’ respect. Again, they would never look at her the same way again. He had stolen her chance to rightfully explain this all to them. Now, this was all they had and that was on Hego. He did not know what the right thing was.

Shego did not say anything. She just stood there for a few tense moments, listening to the sound of her own heavy breathing. She did bother to look at her younger brothers, even though they gawked at her, eyes demanding an explanation, demanding to know how she could be _that_ way.

She eyed her older brother, the man of their so-called family since he was the oldest at twenty-two years old and the legal guardian of their brothers. There was deep contempt in her emerald eyes. _He’s not a man_.

She suddenly walked past him, making sure not to touch him on the way by, despite how much the urge to bump him burned in her. He was not worth it, though. He did not exist to her anymore.

The brothers all gasped in utter surprise as they watched her leave with that proud step she always carried herself with, her head held high. The younger brothers’ mouths all fell open, like they wanted to speak, but no sound would come out. Their hearts did clench in their chests as they realized their sister was leaving.

“If you walk out that door, you can’t come back!” Hego called and she knew exactly what he looked like based on how loud he was.

She could picture how red his face was, almost the same scarlet as the twins’ uniform. He had one hand raised in the air along with his index finger, as if the gesture would force her to turn around and remain with them. He would never be strong enough to control her.

“I don’t plan on it,” Shego replied coolly without turning around and walking out of the monitoring room of Go Tower. The metallic sliding door shut behind her with a hiss, closing out her old life.

“I’m serious!” the eldest hollered with authority, like this was supposed to be enough for her to come back. She could hear his big mouth, but she did not respond to it.

Once she was out of her brothers’ view, Shego growled in anger and punched the closest thing to her, which happened to be the wall. She left a perfect imprint of her right fist in the steel that Go Tower was coated in while her throat burned with a sob and her bottom lip quivered. She forced herself not to cry. She would never cry over something that was not her fault. It was all Hego’s fault, just like always.

“Bastard…” she hissed, glaring at an imagined image of her brother. Her eyes were wet with hot, unshed tears, both sorrowful and angry.

He did not have any right to do any of the things he had done lately, like open her mail. The nosy bastard had been going through her mail, like he had a right to it. Then, he expected her to just be fine with it when he confronted her over some letters.

He did not have any right to go through her things in her room, which he had taken to doing, searching for evidence about her private life. He did not have any right to tell their little brothers her business like he had either, calling it emergency team business and then using it as an excuse to call a team meeting. _Stupid team_. _Stupid older brother thinking he’s my goddamn father and trying to tell me what to do. Stupid fucking older brother costing me my younger brothers_.

A lump rose in her throat and she swallowed it down, but it hurt. _God, I didn’t want them to find out about things this way_. She was not even sure if she wanted her younger brothers to find out at all, as it was not their business. Hego did not have any right to do that to her. _What kind of big brother just outs his younger sister in front of their little brothers without any kind of remorse while making sure to sound as against it as possible?_

The pompous buffoon had just called a meeting for Team Go and merely announced to their little brothers that Shego was gay and he had proof. He had the nerve to pass around love letters from her girlfriend, letters he had taken from her room. He probably read them, too. _Bastard_.

Their younger brothers had appeared totally flabbergasted and looked at Shego as if she was a _thing_ , like she was not even human or their sister, but like she was an object, a disgusting object at that. She supposed Hego’s tone influenced their reactions, but she could not even defend herself because of the shock.

She seriously could not believe any of it as it unfolded. It was like a movie, a cartoon, just anything but her life. How could her brother do this to her? How could her brothers look at her as if she were some sort of creature? It was like everything they had ever been through together did not matter and she was no different than some stranger on the street. Actually, worse than that because they cared about strangers; they saved them all the time, after all.

Hego had continued on, having their little brothers’ attention and backing for the moment. Shego knew she could not compete with Hego for their brothers’ support. It was hard for a big sister to get guys against the older brother they already put on a pedestal, after all.

The twins, being eleven, idolized Hego while looking at Shego as a form of entertainment more often than not. She was someone they could bug while Hego was someone they looked up to, someone they wanted to be like. They had to side with him, which they had, agreeing Shego was doing something immoral and it was bad for the team. They agreed she needed to think about the team and do what was right for them, practically parroting Hego word for word. It was their words that had caused her to hop out of her seat in anger at the time. What the hell did eleven-year-olds know about anything? It hurt just the same, though.

Mego was in a similar position, even though he was fifteen. While he liked to pretend he was a rebel, he was far from it and cried for attention. He had that teenage desire to fit in and his brothers already decided Shego did something wrong. He did not want to go against the group, even though secretly, he could not care less about what Shego did with her personal life. He supposed it would be bad for the team’s image, which helped him feel better about agreeing with Hego. After all, how would it look if one of the members of Team Go, the great saviors of Go City, was a homosexual? That was not cool as far as he knew.

 _The team image_ , Shego mentally scoffed. It was all about Hego’s image in her opinion and her little brothers were too stupid to differentiate between the two. He missed the main point when it all started, anyway, and she guessed that was why the big idiot was surprised she had walked out. She was in love with her girlfriend and that was more important than playing superhero to a city full of people she never met, did not want to meet, and would judge her just for who she was attracted to. Her beloved was more important to her than being a superhero, way more.

Her girl, her beautiful little angel, made her feel things being a superhero could not touch. She felt like she mattered to someone beyond just saving the day, but just by being there. She made someone smile at her for no other reason than the fact that she was there. It was not about needing something from her all the time, but just needing her, enjoying her presence.

She would not let that go for a bunch of stupid people who did not care about what happened to her after the bad guy was stopped. She definitely would not let it go just because people would have the nerve to condemn her for having someone in her personal life that cared about her. And she would not let it go for brothers who dared to judge her over this without even meeting her girlfriend.

None of the people she saved with her brothers cared about her specifically like her girl did. They never thought about her when she was out of sight or missed her when they were apart. They never wanted to sincerely know how her day was and try to make her feel better if the day was crap. They never kissed her with soft lips and whispered “I love you” in such an earnest little voice that made her heart race each and every time she heard it. If she died tomorrow, those people would forget her quickly, but she knew her girl would never forget her.

“My brothers might even forget me, but she’ll be there for me.” Assured of this fact, Shego marched out of Go Tower for what she assumed would be the last time and did not look back.

-8-8-8-8-

Shego stepped into the dark dorm room through the window. She had entered this way a few times, so it was not so difficult. She made sure to do it as quietly as possible, only wanting her target to know of her presence. She went to the right side of the small room, pausing to gaze at the sleeping body in the twin-sized bed. 

There was enough light in the room for Shego to make out Kyoko’s slender form in the bed. She was bathed in moonlight, truly looking like an angel. She seemed so peaceful that, for a moment, Shego felt envious of her. Then, she shook the feeling away and herself settle a bit more. Leaning down, she gently shook Kyoko awake.

“Hey, Kyoko,” Shego whispered to her half-asleep girlfriend.

“Shego-chan?” Kyoko muttered with a yawn. Her Japanese upbringing coming out full force with the honorific added to Shego’s name due to being awakened suddenly.

A little smile worked its way onto Shego’s pale face as it always did when Kyoko called her that. “Yeah.” As if someone else would visit Kyoko in the middle of the night.

“What are you doing here so late?” the eighteen-year-old student inquired. She blinked several times, trying to wake up more. Moonlight came in through the window, highlighting her creaming, sleepy face. She looked so cute. 

“Well, that’s a long story,” Shego remarked with a half smirk, trying to make light of her situation, not just for her girl, but for herself. She did not want or need the gravity of her circumstances to hit her just yet. She could not afford to buckle under the pressure. She had to press on.

“Tell me in the morning. We should not disrespect my roommate by talking while she is asleep. It would be unbecoming to wake her up.”

Shego nodded. “Well, do you mind letting me sleep in the bed with you?”

Kyoko’s dark eyes squinted, trying to make out Shego’s face in the dark. “What? Why?” 

Shego gave an awkward shrug. “It’s all part of the long story.” 

“Perhaps you should tell me now if it is very important,” Kyoko replied.

“I’ll do it in the morning. I don’t want to keep you up,” Shego said. After all, her girl had class tomorrow and needed her rest.

Kyoko smiled a bit because of Shego’s thoughtfulness, which she was quite aware only existed for her. She held her cover up as a signal that Shego could join her in the bed. Shego smiled and stripped off her clothing. She crawled into the narrow bed next to Kyoko, who immediately snuggled up close to Shego. Shego grabbed her in a familiar embrace. It was a comforting hold that assured Kyoko that Shego would never allow anything in the world to harm her. As soon as they were settled, Kyoko fell back asleep and Shego inhaled Kyoko’s soothing scent and felt lost to her.

Kyoko Yoshiko was a Japanese student attending Go University on scholarship. She spoke great English and adapted well to the United States, yet still had the funny quirk of introducing herself as Yoshiko Kyoko, which she had done when she first met Shego. Kyoko had been lost on campus while Shego was just there, realizing what would never be, which was that she would never attend the famous school. She had been accepted when she applied, but she could not afford it and she did not have time for classes anyway because of Team Go. Both of those things she blamed on Hego since he had squandered their parents’ life insurance money on the Go Tower and it was his stupid idea to use their powers to be superheroes in the first place. She had protested that idea, but she had been out-voted and she had decided to stick things out with her brothers since they were all she had left.

Shego had helped Kyoko find her way around Go University those first few days. It had amazed Kyoko when she found out that Shego was not a student at the school, but she was grateful for the help nonetheless. They got to know each other those first few days and found they liked being around each other. Kyoko liked knowing someone in her new city so soon and Shego was just glad for company that was not her brothers, as that had not occurred since she graduated high school. But, they grew to like each other beyond that and ended up dating rather quickly. Shego mostly paid for things through an allowance that Hego gave her and their brothers because Kyoko did not have much money to waste.

Shego liked Kyoko almost immediately, finding her cute and charming. Kyoko had an elegance about her, even though she admittedly grew up kind of poor in a rural area of Japan. She seemed like the opposite of everything Shego was. She was soft spoken and polite while Shego was typically loud and blunt. Kyoko liked the pride Shego always carried with her, the ultimate confidence that radiated off of the pale teenager in powerful waves. Shego often said Kyoko had the same thing about her, but they just exhibited the trait differently. 

They had similar interests, which only grew as they spent more time together. They tended to like the same books, mostly classical pieces and just about anything written by Shakespeare. They also liked the same movies for the most part, usually in-depth dramas. Kyoko was not as into sports as Shego was, but she was open-minded and watched them with Shego to learn about them. Kyoko got Shego into anime, which they were both now very big on. They could talk to each other about anything and they often tried to. They did not mind opening up to each other. They did their best to be understanding with each other, no matter what they did.

They also sort of understood each other in a different way that other people could not relate to. They had both lost their parents. Kyoko had lost her parents at a younger age than Shego, but they still understood each other. Kyoko had lived with her grandparents after she lost her parents while Shego had been under the care of her big brother since he had legally been an adult when their parents died. It had not been much fun for either of them, but now they had each other and they felt like things were going to get better. 

Kyoko also did not get awe-struck by Shego like other people around Go City, which made her comfortable around the Japanese girl. Kyoko had not known she was a hero when they met, so she did not have a reason to get awe-struck. She had been curious about Shego’s skin tone, but thought it would be rude to bring up. As they got closer, Shego had explained what happened with her skin and showed Kyoko her powers. Kyoko reciprocated with explaining what happened with her parents. It was like they had exchanged their deepest secrets.

They also expressed condolences toward each other when they finished their stories. Kyoko had done so because she could tell her girl was touchy about her skin color. Shego had adjusted to being a pale green, but she had hated it thoroughly for a while. It annoyed her when people guessed she was on Team Go based on her skin tone, even though she never confirmed it. She really did not mind it since Kyoko accepted it.

Shego, of course, offered up all sorts of emotional support when Kyoko talked about how she lost her parents, which was through murder of all things. Kyoko had expressed a lot of pride in Shego for being a hero since she had lost her parents to homicide, wishing there was a hero around to save them at the time. Things like that had made Shego all right with being a hero and now she hoped since she had quit the team, it did not mean Kyoko would look at her differently.

“You’re all I have left,” Shego whispered into the night, brushing aside Kyoko’s silky hair. She gave Kyoko a soft kiss and then tried to get some sleep.

-*-(Next morning)-*-

“…So, that’s what happened,” Shego finished explaining to Kyoko that she had left Team Go and why she had done so. Kyoko’s roommate had left for her morning class, so they were alone in the room. They sat on Kyoko’s stiff bed.

“You left your brothers for me?” Kyoko asked in a whisper, eyes already wet with tears. This was flattering, of course, but Shego was lucky to have brothers and she said this often. She did not want to cause a rift between the siblings.

“It’s not your fault,” Shego insisted. She did not want Kyoko to take on that burden, especially since it was Hego’s fault.

“They are you brothers,” Kyoko said, almost like she was in shock.

“I don’t want to be with them if they can’t accept that I’m with you. I can’t just be who they want me to be for the sake of keeping us altogether. That’s not fair to me,” Shego argued.

“But… they are your brothers,” Kyoko said once more. Apparently, this was supposed to mean something.

Scowling, Shego shook her head. It did not seem to mean anything to them. They had let her go just because she found someone who accepted her and loved her like no one else ever had.

“Then they should accept who I love rather than make it an issue and try to force me to choose. I’m not leaving you,” Shego said soundly while reaching over to caress her girlfriend’s smooth cheek, which caused Kyoko to smile.

“Well, I am pleased to know you will not leave me, as I do enjoy having you around. I just do not wish to disrupt your family.”

Shego scoffed. “It’s not your fault, so stop saying that.”

Kyoko nodded. Arguing would not get her anywhere. Shego had made up her mind. More importantly, her brothers had made up their minds.

“It doesn’t matter to you that I might not be a hero anymore, does it?” Shego inquired, squirming a bit.

Kyoko scoffed. “Of course not. I do not love you because you are a hero. I love you because you are you. I love Shego, as herself. So, what are you going to do?”

With a sigh, Shego ran her hand through her thick hair. “I don’t know.”

Shego had walked out on more than her brothers and being a superhero. She had walked out of her home. They lived in Go Tower. She did not have anywhere to go and she knew she could not stay in Kyoko’s dorm room. She did not have any money to her name since she knew Hego would not continue giving her an allowance now that she walked out on them.

“You do need to figure that much out,” Kyoko pointed out with a soft smile.

“I know. Hey, if I find an apartment, how about you move in with me?” Shego suggested with a smile. They had been dating for months, so this could not be too soon, right?

Shego would love nothing more than to be able to live with her girl, see her every day, and hold her every night without worrying about people finding out. It would be a dream come true for her, getting to live with someone she could get along with. She looked forward to such a thing now that she thought about it. She was willing to bet it would be great to live without her brothers since she could not stand being around them anyway.

“Well, first you have to find a job and then an apartment, but I would love to,” Kyoko answered with another smile. She knew that would fire Shego up. Now, all Shego could think about getting a job to afford a place for them to live.

-8-8-8-8-

Shego went out to find a job with vigor, half because she wanted Kyoko to live with her and half to prove she could make it without her stupid brothers. It was a bit hard for her to gain employment. Unlike Hego, who could hide his identity, Shego could not do it too well.

Her green skin was a dead giveaway as to who she was. She tried to cover that up with makeup, which worked well enough, but it was easy to see she wore a ton of makeup. This seemed to make people a little uncomfortable, but it was better than having to deny being a part of Team Go for twenty minutes.

She hit another problem after solving that one. She had no work experience. Her age did not help, being just out of high school. Even after having Kyoko work up a résumé for her, she could not find employment beyond something that would get her minimum wage, which she would take in a heart beat if someone would hire her.

“This is harder than I imagined,” Shego sighed, meeting Kyoko in Go University quad. They had lunch together, simple sandwiches and bottled water.

“I am sure it is, but you should not give up. You are tough and you will persevere,” Kyoko assured her.

Shego smiled. “All of these jobs are crap, too, but they still don’t want to hire me.”

Kyoko encouraged Shego to take whatever job she could get, just so Shego could find and afford a place to live. Before she got a job, she sneaked into Kyoko’s dorm every couple of nights for a few hours of rest before going out to pound the pavement again, searching for employment. Once she got a job, Shego managed to find a place to live, but it was a horrible slum of an apartment. It was all she could afford.

Shego groaned as she looked around her new home. “I should’ve saved more money.” Of course, she would have had to stay homeless to do that. But, then again, she was not sure this place was a set up from living in the subway. She could not imagine Kyoko, with all of her grace and elegance, coming here, so forget living here.

-8-8-8-8- 

True to her word, though, Kyoko moved in with Shego once the school semester was over for the summer. Shego had only had the place for a couple of weeks, so Kyoko had not been properly introduced to it until the moment she was ready to move in. Shego was ashamed to bring Kyoko into the rundown studio apartment that happened to also be infested with vermin.

“This really isn’t some place for you to live,” Shego muttered as a mouse dashed across the floor into the wall. It could be heard running through the wall with dozens of other rodents. This could not be more embarrassing if there was a dead body in the middle of the room.

Kyoko scowled as her eyes focused on a large hole in the wall in the kitchen area, revealing several pipes. “I do not think this is a place for you to live.”

Shego scratched the nape of her neck. “I’ll survive and it’s all I can afford right now.”

Kyoko did not want Shego to be staying some place that was contaminated with rodents and she expressed this often. Shego appreciated the concern, but she was more worried about Kyoko than herself. At the end of summer vacation, Shego sent Kyoko back to the Go University dorms, even though Kyoko protested to the bitter end, not wanting to leave her beloved girlfriend in such a place alone.

“I’ll be fine,” Shego insisted, trying not to break down as Kyoko held her hand right outside of the dorm building. The warmth of Kyoko’s fingers spread through her and made her feel like everything would be all right. She just had to work to make things good for them.

“You could always stay with me. My roommate would not mind if we explain to her the situation,” Kyoko replied.

“It’s all right, sweetheart. I’ll be fine. I just need to save some money. It’ll be fine,” Shego said and she gave Kyoko a gentle kiss to drive home her point. In the end, she almost had literally had to drag Kyoko inside of the building.

Shego returned to the apartment. She could not even think of it as home. She had hoped home would have little Kyoko touches all over the place. Kyoko had not even wanted to drop her book bag here. Shego fell into a chair she found on the curb one day and looked around. The little bit of her furniture she had had all been found either on the curb or in Goodwill. The water always started out brown and had to be run for over a minute before it was clear. Her bedding was thin and already falling apart. The ceiling was cracked and occasionally fell to the floor. If depressing had an address, it would live there, she concluded.

Being alone in the apartment made Shego despair about not having some place worthy enough to have her girl live in. Added to that, she was lonely. She had never been by herself before.

To make matters worse since school started, she knew her one-year anniversary was coming up. “And I can’t afford to buy my baby a damn thing. How fucking worthless am I? Why does she even bother?” 

Her beloved, who had stuck it out with her in an apartment swarming with mice, roaches, and who-knew-what-else and who had only left because she forced her to, deserved the best. But, what in the hell was the best and how would she get it? There was no way in hell she would go ask Hego for money.

Hego had not even tried to get touch with her since she left. The twins tried to talk to her, but they always wanted her to come back and they wanted her to stop being “that way” as well. They did not fully understand why she was gone from what she could tell. She did not like to think about it and she shook it away, focusing on her problem at hand. What would she get Kyoko for their anniversary and how would she get it?

The answer to the first part Shego’s question came in the form of a pair of earrings that she happened to glance at on the way to work. They were simple gold earrings in the shape of little triangles, but they seemed to scream her beloved’s name. She later brought Kyoko by the store and Kyoko practically flipped over those earrings. 

“Maybe we should go in and see them up close,” Shego suggested.

“I would like that,” Kyoko said. 

They went inside to see several different items. Kyoko went right to the earrings, though. Her dark eyes shined as she looked down on them.

Shego thought that was great until she saw the price. They were not even really expensive as far as jewelry went. They were just out of her price range, like everything else in the city. Kyoko’s face fell a bit when she saw the price.

“Oh.” Kyoko sort of chirped. “We should look at other pieces while we are here. I am sure there are some nice things.”

Shego knew her girlfriend wanted to downplay how much she liked the earrings once they learned how much they cost. Shego did not buy the act, though. She needed to find a way to get those earrings. 

She would get Kyoko what she wanted because if she did not, then she was not a very good girlfriend in her opinion. She would have failed the person who stood by her and tried to stay with her in a mouse-infested, roach-infested apartment. There was no way in hell she would let a girl like that down! She would get those earrings by any means necessary… short of asking her brothers for help.

-8-8-8-8-

Kyoko was so surprised her eyes actually twinkled and she let out a little delighted squeal. She could not believe Shego led her to an obviously expensive restaurant. Shego tried to act like it was nothing as she held her girlfriend’s hand and tried to take her inside. Kyoko stopped her by tugging on her hand.

“What’s up?” Shego asked. She wore a little black dress that had caught her girlfriend’s eye the moment that she saw it, which made Shego smirk. She was glad for such a positive reaction from Kyoko. She wanted this to be a night Kyoko would not forget.

“We do not need to go there,” Kyoko replied. She doubted Shego could afford such a place and worried over Shego’s finances more than Shego did. This was why she deserved everything they would do tonight.

Shego smiled. “Sure we do. It’s our anniversary and I want to show you a good time. So, just relax and let me show you a good time.”

“I do not need all of this and you know that,” Kyoko said. She was used to simple things; she had grown up rather poor with her grandparents. She had been lucky to get her scholarship to Go University because without it, she would not have been able to go to college at all. So, she definitely did not need an expensive meal at a fancy restaurant, especially since she knew her lover could not afford it.

“Needing and deserving are two different things, babe. You _deserve_ all this. Let me just pamper you for one night, our anniversary, okay?” Shego insisted. Although, she had plans for the pampering to extend well beyond the anniversary now that she had gotten her hands on some money.

Kyoko wanted to argue, but Shego was not listening and she would not listen. Shego was stubborn, after all. So, Kyoko took a deep breath and stepped closer to Shego. Shego smiled.

“Don’t worry. It will be amazing,” Shego promised.

They went into the restaurant and Kyoko paused. “I feel a bit out of place for such a nice restaurant,” she admitted. She was not dressed for such a luxurious restaurant. She was in a simple button-down magenta shirt and black skirt that hugged her hips.

Shego leaned in. “Don’t worry. You’re the most beautiful creature in here.”

Kyoko blushed at the compliment and Shego preened. The couple had a delightful dinner, even though Kyoko worried about the prices of everything. Shego waved it all off and put Kyoko at ease.

“I really just want you to have a good time. Don’t worry over anything, okay? Trust me on this,” Shego entreated.

Kyoko nodded. She focused on the food, which was delightful. They talked school and work. They enjoyed each other without a care in the world. By the end of everything, Kyoko looked at her with a slightly coy look. Shego swallowed hard, wondering what was on her girlfriend’s mind.

“Do you want your gift now?” Kyoko asked her date.

“Actually, I was hoping you’d come with me to a hotel,” Shego answered as if it was nothing; she even smiled as she spoke. Usually, she knew her bluntness got to the very reserved Kyoko, but she also knew she could imply what she was doing without embarrassing the college student because Kyoko was far from a prude.

“A hotel?” Kyoko echoed, scrunching up her face a little, as if she did not understand. “A hotel?” she repeated, now her eyebrows curled up in concern, like she could not believe Shego was now suggesting they go to a hotel on her budget. They were both stretched financially and yet Shego wanted to go a hotel? It was near madness. 

With a grin Shego knew was far from sexy, she nodded. “Yes. I’ve already got the room.”

“Already?” Kyoko parroted her girlfriend once again. “Love, when did you become such a spendthrift? This is all so sudden.”

“Yes already.” Shego smiled a bit. “Am I being too fast?” she asked, even though they had made love before. It just was not a common occurrence with them. It was not like she could bring Kyoko to her room in Go Tower and they could go at it. They could not do much in Kyoko’s dorm room because her roommate was often around. Shego barely wanted to sleep in her apartment, so she definitely had never tried to do anything more with Kyoko there.

“No,” Kyoko answered, glancing down a moment, as if to collect her thoughts. “I mean, I would not mind going with you if the hotel is already paid for.” She liked physical intimacy as much as the next person. “You must understand I am a bit surprised by your level of spending right now, Shego-chan. Your job does not pay much.”

Shego frowned. “I know.” She did not want to think about her job right now, or the fact that making peanuts would have been a step up for her.

Kyoko tensed a bit. “I apologize. I do not wish to trouble the evening further. Please, let us retire to the hotel.”

Shego took a calming breath and nodded. “So, we’ll exchange gifts in the morning then.”

Kyoko smiled and nodded to that as well. They finished with dinner and Shego paid for everything, not even giving Kyoko a chance to see the bill. Her girlfriend was very too worried about her funds. She also made it a point to hide how much money she was currently carrying as she pulled out bills to pay the check. And then, they were off to the hotel, which was just as ritzy as the restaurant.

Kyoko did not say anything about it, which Shego was grateful for. Shego had to restrain herself from saying anything to the guy who checked them in. He had the nerve to sneer at them. Shego wanted to yank him from over the counter, but Kyoko did not need to see that, especially on their anniversary.

The room was an average-sized space, but it was still in a pricey hotel. It had a single king-sized bed, though. There was a balcony in the room that Shego really had no plans in using, unless Kyoko wanted to be adventurous anyway. If not, she would rather keep Kyoko from the balcony in favor of other activities.

“This is a nice view,” Kyoko said, looking out of the balcony doors, seeing the lights of Go City.

Okay, so maybe the balcony would be worth checking out for a while. The view was romantic and Kyoko deserved romance as much as she deserved nice things. Kyoko turned to look around the room. There was also a television opposite the bed on a dresser, but Shego was determined Kyoko would not even think to turn on the television that night. There was also a nightstand by the bed with a lamp on it that would not be used that night either.

“Do you like it?” Shego asked. If not, she would have to find a better room, in a better hotel.

“It is a wonderful place,” Kyoko replied.

Shego preened again and felt a flutter of pride in her chest. She moved before Kyoko brought up money again, kissing Kyoko with all of the passion she had in her. She wanted Kyoko to know and understand how special she thought the college student was through this one fervent act. 

Kyoko responded to the affection almost immediately and returned it, cupping Shego’s cheeks as they kissed. Shego grabbed at Kyoko’s shirt, about the tear it off of her. They usually did not have time for much foreplay. So, it was a habit to rush everything, but Shego remembered they were alone, they had time, and everything would be all night. They did not have to worry about when Kyoko’s roommate might return. They could take their time and thoroughly enjoy every second of their time together and every inch of each other.

“You’re so beautiful,” Shego said, pulling away from air and to enjoy the flushed look on her love’s face. 

“You are as well.” Kyoko ran a hand through Shego’s hair.

“I want to take my time and appreciate every part of you.”

Kyoko blinked and then blushed. Before she could say anything, Shego came in for another kiss, slower than before. Kyoko moaned, openly for the whole room to hear. The sound vibrated through Shego, going down her spine, and settling in a warm space. This was going to be an amazing night.

-8-8-8-8- 

Kyoko snuggled up close to Shego as they settled in for the night. This was typical how they slept when they had the chance to share a bed. It stemmed from Kyoko feeling safe with her and enjoying that feeling of security. Shego did not mind. She liked that Kyoko trusted her and believed in her to keep her from harm. She would do her best to make sure that nothing happened to Kyoko anyway.

Shego smiled to herself a little as she looked on Kyoko’s sleeping face. Kyoko was worn out. Shego had never seen her so sated. She even slept with a smile on her face. Shego wanted to pat herself on the back. Instead, she settled deeper into the comfortable bed, revealing in the luxury around her as well as the lovely body against her.

“So far, so good,” she mumbled to herself and then reached into the nightstand. She pulled out her gift, believing this would be a very good ending to the whole thing. Putting it away, she decided to get some sleep.

-8-8-8-8-

Sunlight graced the room with its warm presence. Shego woke up and stared at Kyoko more. She was still asleep and still smiling. It was a beautiful sight. _She’ll be even more beautiful when she sees what I got her_.

Shego reached for her gift again and stared it with pride filling her. She could not wait for Kyoko to awake up, even though she was not sure how Kyoko would react to the gift. Kyoko had been so concerned about her money last night that she might get suspicious about how Shego got the present. She would never be able to tell Kyoko just what she had done, but she hoped to whatever divine being there was that Kyoko’s face just lit up when she saw it.

“I just want to do right by her. Is that so wrong?” Shego mumbled to the air.

She had enjoyed getting Kyoko the gift. She had assumed she would feel guilty or something negative when she had did it, but nothing at all. All she felt was pleased she had been able to pull off such a job and in a delicate manner. She was also able to provide something wonderful for the girl she loved, not just the gift, but the whole night in general. Oh, she was pleased with the job she had done and that she had gotten her hands on some money in a fairly easily and enjoyable manner. 

 _But, I will never do anything like that again_. She could not break the law anymore. After all, her girl would undoubtedly be ashamed of her if she knew.

Besides, Shego was many things, but she was not a criminal. Sure, she was ill tempered, mostly when it came to people she perceived as stupid, and she was antisocial to a degree, but she was not a criminal. She liked to believe that no matter what, she was at least a good person.

So, she would not do it again, even though it was fun and she needed the money. Okay, maybe she would not do it unless she really, really needed to, but only when it was her last option, not counting asking her brothers for help, of course. After all, no one got hurt. It was not like she had done anything really wrong. And, places like that had insurance, which they would probably scam. What made them any different than her? So, it was settled, she would never do that again, unless it was the only option she had left.

Shego’s attention was taken from her prize to her love. Kyoko moved against her, indicating she was waking up. She made little mewing noises, causing a smile to spread on Shego’s face. Kyoko’s eyes fluttered open and she smiled at the sight of Shego’s grinning visage. Just the sweet expression made Shego feel special. _I’ve got to do right by her_. _Kyoko deserves everything_. She leaned down and greeted her girl with a tender kiss.

“Happy anniversary,” Shego whispered as she pulled away from the embrace.

“That was yesterday,” Kyoko pointed out in a warm, slightly sleepy voice.

Shego smiled. “To me, it’s every day.” And that was not a line.

Kyoko smiled back. “Charmer.” She leaned in for another kiss, which lasted almost a minute.

“I do try. Here, this is your gift.” Shego handed Kyoko the small box she held.

Kyoko turned her attention to the small box and gently took it from Shego’s grip. She looked at Shego curiously as she began taking the wrapping paper off it. Shego had to resist the urge of tearing the paper off, even though she had put skill she did not even know she had into applying the grass and gold paper. Kyoko gave her a smirk, knowing how badly her slow paced teased Shego. Once Kyoko was finally done, she gasped in surprise. It was the golden triangle earrings.

“How did you…?” Kyoko asked in a low tone. Her eyes asked the question much better than she did. How in the hell could her financially strapped girlfriend buy her those lovely earrings?

“Nothing’s too good for my girl,” Shego remarked, reaching up to caress Kyoko’s soft cheek. “Do you like them?”

“You know I do,” she answered in an awed tone. She removed the jewelry from the box and tried putting them on, but her hands shook from joy. She was so overwhelmed her beloved did such a thing, buying her something that was well out of her budget.

“Here, let me.” Shego eased the earrings into Kyoko’s ears. When she was done, she cupped Kyoko’s face and just admired her. “You look so beautiful.” 

“Thank you.” Kyoko gave her girlfriend a kiss. “I love you.”

Shego’s chest puffed up just a little bit and she smiled so hard it felt like the expression would split her face open. “I love you, too.”

Shego also loved that she was not asked about how she had gotten those earrings. It had been quite the adventure, but Kyoko would never approve. She had been surprised by how easy it was, but she planned it all out, scouted it, and it went off without a hitch. She had cut the rather simple alarm to the high-end jewelry store, swiping the earrings along with a few other items she had been able to sell on the street. She guessed it paid to know her city as well as she did. She knew just where to go to get rid of the stolen goods really quick.

 _It’s great to have money_ , Shego noted. She had been able to treat Kyoko to things that she felt her girl deserved and she wanted to do it more often, which would require more money eventually. For the moment, she was good, though. But, what if one day she was not good?

If the jewelry store heist had proven anything, getting more money would not be a problem, but she told herself already that she was not going to do it anymore. She had to stick to that. She was not a thief, not a criminal. It was just that one time to make sure that her girlfriend had a good anniversary. _That was all it was_ , she told herself.

Kyoko did not ask Shego where she got the money for the earrings or for anything else really. She really just wanted to focus on how great their anniversary had been. So, she gave Shego her gift, which was a photo album chronically their relationship until that point. Shego was speechless and only able to gasp, which was fine. Kyoko kissed Shego and occupied their time all of the way to checkout time.

“Thank you for such an amazing time,” Kyoko said.

Shego practically melted at this. She wanted Kyoko to look at her as she was right now all the time. Kyoko stared at her as if she had hung the moon. So, yes, money was good for now, but eventually the money ran out and she wanted to continue treating Kyoko the way she deserved. Maybe Kyoko would just accept it, as she did this night. 

-8-8-8-8- 

“Shego, should you not be saving money? How are you able to shower me with such gifts?” Kyoko asked as Shego presented her with a textbook. They were in Kyoko’s dorm with Kyoko at her desk.

Shego scoffed as she flopped down on the bed. “Babe, it’s a textbook, not a gift. You needed it.” 

“Yes, I did require it, but you have to save your money. You cannot keep spending on me.”

Shego smiled. “I like spending on you. Besides, one day, you’ll be supporting us.” She laughed to deflect the subject off of her. 

Clearly, Kyoko started getting a bit suspicious as time went by and Shego started bringing her more gifts, things that were decidedly not textbooks. Sometimes, they were just school supplies, but more often than not they were baubles and trinkets. Shego could not stand by and want her girl miss out or end up in debt. She had to do something, right? Kyoko deserved to finish school.

But, gifts and textbooks were not cheap. Actually, some jewelry cost less than some textbooks. Kyoko was not stupid by far.

She could not figure out where Shego got the money for things. As far as Kyoko knew her girlfriend still worked a low paying job and should not have money to waste, as she seemed to be doing. Kyoko sighed.

“Shego, I do not mean to make it sound like you are incompetent when it comes to handling money, but I need you to be more frugal,” Kyoko requested with her dark eyes shining.

Shego felt like an ass. Kyoko was so worried over her. She was the one who should do the worrying. Kyoko deserved better than her.

“It’s fine, love. I want to be here for you. Don’t worry about my money, please,” Shego replied, hoping it would rid Kyoko of the worried look. 

From then on, Kyoko did not say much about money, like she wanted to avoid insulting Shego. Shego ended up giving Kyoko gifts because she always had money left over after doing “jobs” due to “emergencies.” Her definition of an emergency was expanding rapidly. It started out with her not being able to make her rent on time and then her needing money for food. When Kyoko needed textbooks, those, too, became “emergencies.” 

Now, it got to the point where Shego broke into places because she felt like she “needed” shoes. Well, she could not very well continue going around in the shoes she had once she nearly worn a hole in them, but it had not even occurred to her to save her up paycheck for new shoes. Now, whenever she needed something new, her mind went straight to breaking in somewhere.

After doing “jobs,” she typically had money to waste and she liked wasting it on Kyoko. It made her feel good to see her girl smile at her. It made her feel outstanding knowing she could offer Kyoko things like a responsible adult could. It made her feel fantastic being able to stand on her own and not need her brothers’ help in any way, shape, or form. It helped that she got an adrenaline rush when she did jobs. It was even better than the rush she used to get fighting villains.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: the positives and negatives of Shego’s new job.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters and I don’t own the song that inspired it.

“ _Everything I do, I do for us too…_ ” – [Street Symphony (the remix)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nc3W4mfbtNo).

Choices 

Part: Two

“Okay, baby, open your eyes,” Shego said. She held Kyoko around her shoulders after leading her girlfriend to a surprise.

Kyoko had not said anything, but “surprises” where starting to become almost a daily thing with Shego and they tended to be material items. Before a surprise from Shego meant she showed up unannounced and was going to take her out to the movies, but ever since their great first anniversary, which had been several months ago, the surprises had been becoming more and more frequently. They grew gradually from little things to bigger items, things Shego should not have been able to afford. Shego spent money like she had more than enough. Kyoko could not help wondering where her lover was suddenly getting so much spending money.

Kyoko did as she was instructed to, opening her eyes, which felt like they had been shut for hours instead of a couple of minutes. She gasped when she saw what the surprise seemed to be and had to blink several times to make sure if was not an illusion. They were in a very elegant, modern apartment. She turned to her lover with wide eyes and her mouth slightly open. 

“What is this?” Kyoko inquired, her eyebrows drawing close together.

“This is our new condo,” Shego answered with a proud smile, holding her chin up high. 

Shego had obviously saved up some money, even though she tried to spoil Kyoko rotten. Where could she have gotten all of this money, though? Her job definitely did not pay enough for her to spend what she had been spending, but there was no logical way for Shego to be able to afford this place.

“New condo?” Kyoko echoed with her brow wrinkling more than before. She squinted as she stared at Shego. “Shego, love, tell me you are not into drugs,” she begged. Something like that would explain why her girlfriend seemed to have so much money lately. She doubted it would be hard to get into drugs with the neighborhood Shego lived in, well, used to live in.

Shego laughed like this was the funniest thing she had ever heard. “Drugs?” She laughed even more.

It could have been worse. Kyoko could have asked if she was a prostitute, but Kyoko was not sure a prostitute would have the money Shego had, unless she was a seriously high-class escort. She also could not see Shego doing something that could potentially endanger their health like that, but something had to explain where Shego got so much money.

“Where are you getting all of this money? Is it drugs?” Kyoko pled, hoping it was not drugs. She would love to know Shego was not doing something unsavory or illegal, but she supposed that was the only way to explanation.

“No, it’s not drugs,” Shego assured her beloved with a smile and a hug. “Now, let’s break this puppy in and make love in every freaking room.”

Kyoko laughed and did not argue with Shego. It sounded like a grand idea. Of course, Kyoko could not help wondering how her girlfriend could afford a condo like this, especially as she got the tour. These gifts were now truly alarming. She was curious and she really wanted to know, so she had to ask. Well, she asked when they were done.

-8-8-8-8-

“Shego, where have you been getting money for all of this stuff?” Kyoko inquired with her fingers running up and down Shego’s side.

The couple was in _their_ bedroom in _their_ bed, which was a king-sized bed polished a shiny black. The spread on the bed was black, too, even the pillowcases. The room itself was white, though.

The walls begged to be painted and Shego planned on a green, but she wanted to wait for Kyoko’s input. After all, Kyoko would live there, too, and she knew from experience it was no fun to live some place that she did not give input in. There was a black dresser because they were going to need some place to their clothing, but other than that that and the bed, the room was quite bare. On top of the dresser, Shego kept the photo album Kyoko had given her on their anniversary.

Shego felt like this new place to live was a priority. Now, she could live with Kyoko again without having to worry about her. Everything would be right in the world as far as she was concerned. She would be able to treat her girl like a princess, just like Kyoko deserved.

Shego felt could not even describe the feelings that went through her in being able to provide for her girl. It felt good for her to be able to supply something point blank. She stood on her own and could hold up Kyoko. It felt so freaking great and she would treasure it, making sure it lasted for as long as it could.

“I got a new job,” Shego answered in regards to where she got her money. It was not a lie, at least.

Kyoko turned onto her side, looking at Shego’s face with a smile. The way her dark eyes sparkled made Shego just want to kiss her and go at it again. But, now was not the time. Kyoko wanted to talk and that was fine. Talking with Kyoko was one of Shego’s favorite things.

“I am glad for it. I knew if you got some experience, a better job would come alone. What is your new job?” Kyoko inquired.

Kyoko seemed quite pleased and probably already assumed it was nothing illegal. She had been worried for nothing. She even leaned over, giving Shego a kiss. Her lips were so sweet and loving. 

Shego glanced at her lover, feeling guilt gnaw at her. The look in her eye told Kyoko that she did not want to tell and she would prefer not to be asked. Kyoko sighed because of the secrecy and cuddled closer to Shego, which made the green-skinned teen smile. She just hoped Shego was not doing something wrong or dangerous.

“I’m going to take care of you, baby. I promise,” Shego said and she leaned down to kiss Kyoko’s forehead.

“You will not have to for too long,” Kyoko replied. After all, once she graduated, she planned to get a job of her own. She wanted to get into business. “One day, I will be able to shower you with wonderful gifts as you do with me.”

Shego smiled and caressed Kyoko’s soft cheek. “I want to for as long as possible because I love you. So, I’m going to take care of you, always, even when you have a job and can buy me things. You’re my princess and I’m going to treat you like one.” Shego hugged her girl close to her and stroked Kyoko’s shoulder.

“Just… do not get hurt doing it,” Kyoko whispered. She was not sure what else to say, especially since she had a feeling her girlfriend was doing something, well, not right.

“I won’t get hurt. I’m going to give you the comfortable life you deserve,” Shego declared.

“I am pretty happy with life as it is,” Kyoko replied with an open smile. “Time could stand still and I would die happy right here.”

Shego only laughed, even though she had no doubt Kyoko was happy with life as it was. Shego would make sure it got better since she could. She would make sure her girl did not have to worry about anything at all ever again and her new “job” would make that possible, which only made her love “working” more so than she already did. Kyoko just gave her a reason to go out and work even harder, though.

-8-8-8-8-

Shego bought Kyoko all the latest clothes since Kyoko was sorely in need of a new wardrobe. Her grandparents could not afford to send her much money to get new things. Well, Shego handled that. Anything it seemed like Kyoko needed, she had money for now. And if Kyoko wanted something, hell, she could probably buy five of them for her girl after a while.

Shego also made it a point to send money to Kyoko’s grandparents, so Kyoko did not have to worry about them financially speaking. She did not want her lover to have to worry about anything at all. She even pointed out that Kyoko did not have to feel so much pressure from school anymore because if she lost her scholarship, she could pay the tuition.

“That is sweet of you, my love, but you should remember that if I lose my scholarship, I will probably be kicked out of the country. I am here on a student visa,” Kyoko reminded her.

Shego smiled at her from their new dining room table, which Kyoko had picked out. It could fit four people comfortably, if they should ever decide to have people over. “That’s true. But, still, don’t worry about it. I’ve saved and I could pay your tuition if we need it. And, you should know, if you got kicked out of the country, I would follow you right back to Japan.”

Kyoko smiled back and then moved around their state-of-the-art kitchen. She wanted to make breakfast for them. She often did this.

“Perhaps you should join me next semester,” Kyoko suggested. It sounded like she opened the refrigerator.

“You are brilliant, babe. I think I will do that,” Shego declared.

 _It’s great to not have to worry about money_ , Shego thought. She could make her girl happy and she had actually found something she enjoyed doing, not even remembering she had planned to never do it again after the first time. Now, she wished she gotten into her new career earlier in life since it got her everything that she wanted, but she supposed it never would have occurred to her before. She had always been sarcastic and maybe a little cranky, but she had never been one to do anything really wrong or illegal. Now, things had changed and she had no problem pulling a job almost once a week. It was a rush. Every single time she did, it was such a rush.

The more Shego stole, the more she wanted to do it. She just thought of it as a way to shower her girl with more and more gifts, which she did do. She loved the way Kyoko’s face lit up when she gave Kyoko something. The expression itself was motivation to go out and just keep doing her thing. The fun factor helped, of course, but she tried not to think about that.

She tried not to think of how fun it was because openly admitting she liked being a thief seemed wrong to her. She was not supposed to be a criminal. Hell, her parents were probably rolling over in their graves over it. _Probably wondering how the hell I fell so far_.

So, she told herself she did it for the one that she loved. She did it to survive. Her parents would understand that. If she could support herself and Kyoko in some other way, she would and she should, she tried to tell herself. She was a walking contradiction most of the time because of the thoughts she refused to acknowledge. After all, sometimes she told herself she wished she had started stealing sooner in life while other times she told herself she would never do it again if only she could make a decent living doing something else. _Maybe after I get a real education, I can do something_.

“Are you all right, love?” Kyoko asked as she placed a plate of breakfast in front of Shego.

Shego snapped out of her thoughts. “Hmm?”

“Are you all right? You looked… what is the term? Zoned out,” Kyoko said.

Shego shook her head. “No, it’s nothing.” She turned her attention to breakfast. Kyoko mixed traditional Japanese and American food, which Shego liked. So, there was congee, cheese omelet, fruit, and toast. “It looks good.” She smiled at her girlfriend. 

Kyoko sat down across from her. “I can take care of you as well.” She blushed slightly from this, but it only made Shego smile more.

“You do a good job,” Shego said. Without Kyoko, more often than not, she would forget to eat or just grab some junk food in favor of planning her next move. Hell, sometimes, she doubted she would even have a “next move” if Kyoko was not there.

-8-8-8-8-

Eventually, Shego had to find better fences because she stole bigger and better things. Little jewelry stores were nothing at this point. They were not a challenge to get into, so she stopped bothering with them a couple of months after she started this.

She moved on to fine art from museums, which she knew could fetch some good money if done properly. It involved having more connections in the underworld. Those were easy to get consider she had been doing burglaries for months now.

“You really think you can rip me off over this? It’s the only seascape this guy ever painted,” Shego said to a fence. He gasped, like he thought she was stupid.

She surprised a lot of people she dealt with in the underworld by knowing the basic value of the art she swiped for them. She was no idiot and she knew art theft would fetch a good chunk of change as long as she had a buyer lined up beforehand. It would be virtually impossible to sell a hot painting to just any old person on the street, but what she hated was when they tried to renegotiate after the job was done. She got buyers through her connections in the criminal world, where her reputation steadily grew. Her ability to get good art, led to people hiring her to grab other things for them and people even started recommending her.

By the time the next semester of school started, Shego enrolled and Kyoko had a new car, a gift from Shego. Shego would rather Kyoko drive to school in style than for Kyoko to have to take the bus anywhere in Go City. Life was going mighty swell, Shego thought. Everything was going to be all right in her opinion.

After all, she had a high paying occupation and could easily provide for her girlfriend. Kyoko had never seemed happier. They had a strong relationship still. She was independent and had no plans to ever go back to her brothers. Everything just seemed to be going smoothly and she did not see why that should continue.

-8-8-8-8-

“Shego-chan, you do not think the car is too much?” Kyoko asked. This flaunting of money worried her once more. There was no reason for Shego to be able to afford a condo, tuition, and a new car.

“The car’s fine. You like driving it, right?” Shego countered.

“That is beside the point,” Kyoko argued. She moved, wanting to stand before Shego to have this discussion. She settled in front of Shego, who was on the couch with a book in her hands.

“Why? You need a car. In the end, this is actually cheaper than paying for the bus and train everyday. So, don’t worry about it. It’s better this way,” Shego stated and then turned her attention back to her book.

Kyoko frowned. She understood this was how Shego blew her off or dismissed the subject of money. But, the money was actually the problem. The more Shego got, the more she seemed to think they needed.

“My love, you do know money is not important to me, yes?” Kyoko inquired. Shego always made it seem like all of this material wealth was for her, but it was not important to her. Shego was important to her. 

Shego looked back up and put her book down. She reached out for Kyoko and pulled her down to the couch. Kyoko straddled Shego’s waist while Shego settled her hands on Kyoko’s hips.

“You deserve the best, Kyoko. I want to give you the best,” Shego insisted. 

“You have given me more than enough, my love. I do not want to see you hurt and I wish for you to chase your own dreams,” Kyoko replied, moving a hand to Shego’s cheek. Shego was always warm, bordering on hot, but she loved nothing more than to hold her love, have Shego with her. “This is more important than money,” Kyoko whispered, motioning between them. Her hand settled on Shego’s heart. “I care most about this.”

Shego actually sniffled. A hand went back to Kyoko’s neck and played with her hair briefly before Shego pulled her in for a gentle kiss. Kyoko returned the show of affection, felt Shego’s love for her just as always, but she still worried. Something just was not right with them, something tipped out of balance, and she was not sure if she could fix it. This frightened her almost as much as Shego getting injured on “the job.”

-8-8-8-8-

“Damn it,” Shego mumbled as she entered the condo. The place was dark, which she expected. She had left Kyoko sleeping to go out and get some work done.

She had started sneaking out more often, trying to wait for Kyoko was in a deep sleep before going to put some work in. She was never strapped for cash now and she might have just pulled a job days ago, which had been the case that night. She had gotten things done, but things had not totally gone according to plan because the damned security system kicked in with something new — lasers. She had missed that when studying the layout and paid the price on her way out by getting burned across her arm before she could escape with her plunder.

The thief silently made her way to the bathroom, lightly treading on their polished, light hardwood floors. She hoped to take care of her wound before sneaking back into bed with Kyoko being none the wiser in regards to her absence. She entered their bathroom and clicked on the light.

A tiled mosaic of blue and green hummingbirds in a garden on the walls watched her all around the room. There was a shower in the far corner of the room with three showerheads. The bathtub was black, large, and circular with two steps leading up it. It was a Jacuzzi-style tub. The sink, which was Shego’s destination since the medicine cabinet was above it, had golden gooseneck style facet. The golden handles were designed to look like resting birds. Kyoko liked birds.

Shego unzipped her green and black cat suit to take care of the burn; she used her Team Go uniform for reasons that were beyond her. Maybe she looked at as getting back at her brothers by using the team uniform while she was doing something she knew they would be totally against, but she never tried to really rationalize it to herself. She was surprised when the door opened and she saw Kyoko was not sleeping.

“Love, are you all right?” Kyoko asked and then she caught sight of the burn, marring her lover’s toned arm. “What happened to your arm?”

“Nothing. Work-related injury,” Shego joked with an awkward smile. She hoped her girlfriend would not fuss over her. She did not want questions to come up from her little mishap.

“Let me take care of that for you,” Kyoko volunteered.

Shego did not argue. It would not work and Kyoko was moving already. So, Shego made herself comfortable, sitting on the closed toilet while Kyoko went to fixing up the burn. She pulled out the necessary items from their medicine cabinet, which was flanked by a row of lights on both sides. She put what she needed down on the sink and inspected the wound as she bandaged it. Shego noticed the examination and hoped questions would not follow.

“This looks pretty bad. I hope someone did not do this to you,” Kyoko commented in her usual tone to avoid sounding as concerned as she was. She knew if she expressed too much concern when Shego thought she was fine, then she would only irk her lover.

“No, no one did it to me,” Shego assured her beloved with the hope it would keep Kyoko from pressing the issue or getting worried over nothing in her opinion anyway.

“This work… it seems dangerous,” Kyoko said in a smaller voice, but she was not whispering. It was as if she was not sure if she wanted to bring the subject up and thought doing it in a gentle voice would make it more acceptable to approach.

“Well, everything has it dangers,” Shego remarked and added a shrug to downplay the situation. _God, I really don’t want to talk about it, especially not with Kyoko_.

“Perhaps…” Kyoko muttered, dark eyes trained on Shego’s wound.

Emerald eyes narrowed as she focused on Kyoko. “Perhaps what?”

“You should take a few days off. If only to let this heal,” Kyoko commented. There was something in those words that sent an ominous shiver down Shego’s spine.

“Perhaps,” Shego agreed. She had already sold the item she lifted and she did not have another job lined up. She could take some days off, even though she really wanted to just get another job. She needed money, after all. She had to take care of her very thoughtful girl.

When Kyoko was done, she actually kissed the wound. “Now, back to bed with us.” Shego could only nod and allowed Kyoko to take her back to bed. There were no more questions.

-8-8-8-8-

Kyoko glanced to the empty seat next to her in class. Shego usually sat there. It was a required course they had decided to take together. It was a morning class and Shego had decided to sleep in instead of going into class. It would seem she had a tough night at “work” and was exhausted.

Kyoko had noted her lover slipped out every few nights, and how it got more frequent as time passed. Last night was no exception. She has grown to miss Shego at night. _Will I have to miss her during the day now, as well?_ She used to think it would be nice to have her lover in bed for the whole night for a change and now there was this. She had to worry about Shego out at night for insane hours and now she had to worry about her at home as well.

Kyoko wondered what “work” was for Shego. It was not drugs, she believed that, but it was apparently dangerous for her to get burns, cuts, and come in late hours, wanting nothing more than to sleep for the whole day. She supposed it was a good thing Shego healed better than others or she would insist they go to the hospital when Shego came in injured. Of course, Shego would refuse, but the injuries seemed to be a little more frequent as well.

All of this was starting to become a habit with Shego. She missed class more often and she came in late every night. She did not even bother to look at the notes Kyoko got for her. “Work” seemed to have became more and more important to Shego, which made it more and more of a curiosity to Kyoko. She tried her best not to think about it. She was all too aware she did not wish to know, but she could not ignore it anymore. She could not willingly be blind to what her beloved was doing anymore.

She did not care about how much money Shego brought in. The “job” seemed to play with Shego’s priorities in her opinion. Shego needed to be in class and she needed to graduate college to fulfill her dream of becoming an engineer. That was what was important, not all of this money, especially when they really did not need any more money. They had everything they needed, so now all she wanted was Shego back.

She wanted back the Shego who always went on about being an engineer once they hit campus. She wanted the Shego back who knew taking her out to the movies once in a while was better than showering her with material gifts almost every day. She wanted back the Shego who knew automatically that all she needed to be happy was for Shego to be there without thousands of dollars having to be involved. She wanted _her_ Shego back and she could not stand idly by while “work” consumed her beloved. She needed to do something to get Shego to stop whatever “work” was.

That night, she decided she would try to stop her love. As Shego was set to rise from their bed, Kyoko made her move. She reached out and wrapped her arms around Shego, hugging herself against Shego’s back. Shego went rigid, undoubtedly shocked Kyoko was awake. Little did she know, but most of the time she sneaked out Kyoko was awake. Kyoko was also usually awake when Shego came back in as well.

Shego’s beautiful emerald eyes went wide, but she did not turn around to face Kyoko. Kyoko could see shadows dance across her lover’s pale visage. Shego was probably debating if she should say something, if she should lie to Kyoko, or just come up with a less than truthful excuse.

“Stay with me tonight,” Kyoko requested in a small, but clear voice. She sounded strong, even though her voice was low. She knew what she wanted and she seemed resolute in getting it. She did not want to be alone that night in bed again. She did not want Shego to go out and something happen to her. She did not want Shego to miss another class and ruin her chances at being an engineer.

“Kyoko…” Shego muttered. She actually sounded a bit shaken, like she was not sure what she should do.

“Do not go out. Stay with me.” Kyoko’s voice was even stronger than before. Maybe if she finally pressed, things would right themselves.

“I… can’t,” Shego replied, almost as if she was ashamed of that.

“Why can’t you?” Kyoko asked in a gentle tone, hoping it would get her girlfriend to reconsider. She wanted Shego to stay with her, not just at that moment, but always. She did not want Shego sneaking off anymore.

Shego turned her face to the wall and sucked her teeth. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to.”

Kyoko’s stomach flipped a little. “I want you to stay with me.” She might even want answers at this point. She still sounded unyielding in her statement, but it was not working on her beloved. She did not know what to do about that. Was work now more important she was? Was money more important than she was? Now, her stomach burned at the possible answers.

“Not tonight,” Shego answered, her voice low, almost apologetic. She turned her head, looking away again.

“Please, tonight,” Kyoko begged, her voice wavering now. She feared she was going to be left alone yet again and that her wants really did not matter to her lover. The fear made everything inside of her shiver.

Shego inhaled sharply and took a moment to respond. “Baby, I’ve got to go out. It’s what I do. It’s how I keep us afloat.”

“We have more than enough to float. Soon, I will graduate and I can work while you finish school. This does not need to continue.”

“No, it doesn’t, but for now, I’m the one who has to work. So, let me go and go back to sleep,” she added, still sounding gentle, but also curt in an odd way. Her tone had an underlying sharpness to it brought on by the edge because she felt delayed.

“I do not want to. I do not want you to leave,” Kyoko replied in a near desperate tone now and she held Shego as tightly as she could. “My love, become the engineer you have dreamed of.” She wanted Shego to follow her dream, not travel down the dark road she seemed intent on walking.

“I will one day. Go back to sleep. I have to leave. If I don’t, certain people wouldn’t like it,” Shego stated.

Kyoko squinted in the dark, hoping to make out Shego’s features. “Certain people?” She did not like the sound of that one bit and it was only more of a reason for Shego to follow her dream and get out of the mess she was in before it was too late.

“Yes, so go back to sleep. Besides, I’m doing this for us. I want us to be able to live comfortably together.”

Kyoko released Shego, partially because of the implications that something bad would happen if she did not let Shego leave and the fact that she wanted to believe Shego was doing it for them. Shego took her chance and left without turning to look back. Kyoko sighed. She was really starting to really worry and now she felt a bit guilty that she had not put up more of a fight. That was going to change.

-8-8-8-8-

Shego sighed as she sat on a rooftop, trying to get her head together. She could not believe Kyoko had been awake. _Maybe I’m getting sloppy_. She did not see how she was getting sloppy at sneaking out of her own home when she was getting better with every job at breaking and entering places. She would have to be more careful around Kyoko. She did not want to cause her beloved any stress or worry. After all, there was nothing to worry about. She would handle everything and be able to take care of the both of them no matter what.

“What am I going to do if she wakes up again, though? Or if she starts asking more questions?” She could not lie to her perfect angel, which was why she froze when Kyoko began questioning her tonight. She had some conscience left. _Then what will I do if Kyoko asks again? Hell,_ when _she asks again._

She itched to go out and do her thing, even though she refused to acknowledge this. She needed to go out, which was why she dipped out tonight in spite of Kyoko’s begging. So, how would she get by Kyoko without lying?

“No, no, no. I didn’t _need_ to go out. I just have buyers waiting and they wouldn’t be happy if I didn’t show up. That’s all,” Shego told herself. She said it aloud, wanting to make it more real. “I couldn’t stay in.” She frowned and growled. “Why did she ask me?”

She was not sure if she wanted to be upset with Kyoko asking the impossible of her, as she saw it anyway, or if she wanted to be ashamed for not being able to give her girl what she wanted at that very moment.

More than that, she thought about how Kyoko’s voice trembled as she begged. There was fear in her voice and it settled heavy in Shego’s stomach, burning throughout her whole torso. It made it hard to breathe. She felt ashamed of herself.

“I can make it up to Kyoko. I can make this better. I mean, we have an amazing life. Things only Kyoko could’ve imagined before me. She had to understand why I’m working. I want the best for her,” Shego said. For once, though, she recognized she was more trying to convince herself than anything else. It did not matter, though. She could make it all better.

-8-8-8-8-

Shego took a semester off from school and Kyoko had a feeling she would never go back. Shego had lost all interest in school before the semester even ended and her girlfriend was very aware of that. Her focus was mostly sleeping during the day. She could not even wake up for breakfast anymore, spending too much time out during the entire night.

Kyoko slept alone more often, almost every single night now. She knew the more she remained silent, the deeper her loved would dig herself in whatever underworld she had worked herself into. She had to do something or she might lose her beloved.

“Shego,” Kyoko said. They were in their bedroom, sitting on the bed, on top of the black spread. They were both in their pajamas, just tank tops and shorts. It was comfortable and nice.

Kyoko was positioned behind Shego, brushing her hair. It had been something they used to do all the time, take turns brushing their long ebony manes, but most of the time now, Shego did not even want to be bothered with the activity. Kyoko was glad that had changed tonight at least. It showed her that her Shego was still in there somewhere underneath this new creature that only desired to work.

“Yeah?” Shego replied. She rolled her shoulders and leaned back a little, like she sought body contact with Kyoko.

“I want you to stop doing what you are doing,” Kyoko stated, speaking firmly, but making sure not to sound like she was giving a command or ultimatum. As far as she was concerned, that was the only way to save her love. Shego needed to stop. They did not need money anymore, so she did not have to put herself in danger anymore. There was no need for it. They could live happily and comfortable off of everything Shego had already gained.

“Baby, I’m doing this for us,” Shego replied. It was almost her automatic answer when the subject of her work was brought up. Kyoko was tired of hearing this excuse.

“How are you doing this for us? We do not need anything anymore. You have gotten us everything, so I want you to stop before something happens to you,” Kyoko replied, speaking in her usual soft tone, but sounding urgent too. It was not a command coming from her, but a plea.

“Nothing is going to happen to me,” the former hero insisted, going so far as waving the very idea off with a flick of her hand. She was powerful and she was smart.

“Something could. You are not invincible nor are you immortal. You could end up in jail or worse,” Kyoko argued. She did not even want to voice the “worse” part of that, but it frightened her very much about what could happen with her beloved.

“I won’t, so just let it go,” Shego huffed with a small frown.

“You could. Anything could happen. Not just to you, but to me as well. What if you make someone ‘unhappy’ and they come after me to get back at you?” Kyoko pointed out. The idea truly bothered her quite a bit. It was not wholly impossible for her to be used as bait or payback for something her beloved did and she was not sure if her girlfriend actually took either of their safety into real consideration.

“Is that what you think?” Shego turned sharply and stood up quickly. “Do you think I would ever let someone hurt you?” She glared down at Kyoko with fury in her eyes and her nostrils flared. “As if I would ever let anyone to hurt you! Whatever happened to all of that trust you had in me to keep you safe and unharmed? What the hell is going on for you to dare suggest such a thing?”

Kyoko remained calm as best she could. She expected Shego’s anger, as this was a blow to her pride. “I believe you will always keep me safe, but I do not believe you have truly considered all the possibilities of this life.”

Shego continued to glare. “Like what?” she snarled.

“There is little you could do if they were to show up while you are gone, which you often are,” Kyoko stated while climbing to her feet, too. She wanted to remain calm, but there was so much turmoil in her heart. She did not want to lose Shego, but she was not sure if Shego had considered any of this. “You are always gone when I get home from school and you are typically just coming in when I wake up, so you just go to bed. We hardly see each other at all anymore,” she added heatedly. It was like she was not even worth her lover’s time anymore, like she was superfluous to Shego’s life.

Turning her mouth up, Shego studied her for a long moment and then Shego relaxed a little. “Is that it? Are you lonely?”

“Well, there is that,” Kyoko admitted, even though it did not negate her other points. She had been lonely for some months now. She missed her lover and often found herself curling up with Shego’s pillow since Shego was not there. The aroma lingering on the pillow was a poor substitute for the woman it belonged to.

“Well, I’m sorry about that,” Shego apologized, as if that would be the end of the argument. She even moved like she was going to embrace her girlfriend.

Kyoko growled and glared at Shego even harder, putting her arm out to prevent Shego’s embrace. “That is not it, so do not think you can come over here and hug me to make everything all better. It is not just that I am lonely, but I want you to stop doing this. I worry for you and I am so tired of you saying that you are doing this for us.”

The frown that cut across Shego’s face could have destroyed a lesser soul. “I am! Why the hell else would I be doing this? I’m doing this for us!”

“No, you are not, so stop saying that. You are doing this to do it and now you need to stop before something happens. I do not want you to get arrested and I damn sure do not want you to be killed!” Kyoko practically hollered as she spoke, showing she had picked up something from being with Shego for three years at this point.

“I won’t!” Shego huffed indignantly, stomping her foot and throwing her hands up. “I’m not some idiot or weakling who doesn’t know what I’m doing! Everything’s going to be fine, okay? I’m going to be able to provide for you forever with this, okay! So, just shut up about it!” she barked. 

Kyoko was unmoved and unfazed by those words and the tone. “Shego, darling, you have given me all I need and more, so just walk away from it while you still can,” she replied in a calm tone, hoping to get through to her aggravated lover.

Shego folded her arms across her chest. “I won’t. There’s still more to be gained. There’s still more to get,” she gave determined growl. “I want it all and I can get it all. I can give you everything you deserve and so much more. I could give you the world and I bet you’d shut the hell up about this.”

Kyoko gasped and reeled back a little. “So, you are really in it for the money, not for us.” The realization physically pained her now that it was out there and she struggled to stay on her feet. No, _her_ Shego might actually be gone and this creature was there forever.

“I’m in it for us,” Shego stated in a dangerously low tone, as if she would attack Kyoko if she contradicted her again.

They both knew it would never cross Shego’s mind to harm Kyoko, especially not on purpose, but this conversation seemed to be pushing her to an edge. Kyoko did not care about that. Maybe if they got to a point, Shego would realize how far she had gone astray. Maybe Shego would come back to her.

“If you are, you will walk away because we have all we need. We can build from this. So, just walk away from it. Come back to school. Get your engineering degree like you wanted—” Kyoko said in a reasonable tone, but she was cut off.

Shego snarled. “I don’t need that anymore! I don’t want to be an engineer.” It was as if she meant that. She probably did, but neither of them was totally sure on that. She had wanted to be an engineer from when she was a young child and her stupid older brother told her that girls were not good at science and math. She would show him, she had silently vowed back then. It did not seem so important anymore and she had forgotten the promise she made to herself as a child. Right now, she was busy showing him she did not need him to live.

“I thought that was your dream,” Kyoko pointed out. She remembered that was all her girl talked about whenever they hit the school’s campus, just how great an engineer she would be. There was always such a beautiful light in those emerald eyes when she mentioned it. 

Kyoko wanted to see that happen. She wanted her lover to achieve that dream because she knew that would bring Shego true happiness, not all of the material garbage that she kept collecting. Shego was much too brilliant to let this pass her by. 

“My dream is to be able to give you everything you want and deserve,” Shego said forcefully with a fierce look in her eyes, as if that would get Kyoko to understand.

“You have, so let it go,” Kyoko replied in a calm, but forceful tone of her own. That was a command. 

“There’s still more,” Shego growled and made a fist. There was still so much more and she silently admitted she was doing something she loved. And, as long as she kept doing it, she could give her love the world and more.

“Shego, there is not anymore, so walk away. Stay with me,” Kyoko implored her beloved with an aching expression in her eyes that she felt beyond her chest, somewhere in her soul. Shego was the love of her life and she did not want to be without her, but this was all too much. She could not deal with the lies, the mystery, and the possible danger to both of them. She certainly could not stand to see her beloved fall further away from her and turn into someone she did not even know.

Shego took a breath and her nostrils flared again. “What are you trying to say?” she asked through gritted teeth as she narrowed her gaze on Kyoko.

Kyoko took a deep breath and held her hand out slightly. “Darling, please, just stay with me. You walk away from this or I will walk away because you are not doing this for us anymore. You are doing this for either the love of money or the thrill. I do not want to be here when this catches up with you. I do not want be here when you are arrested or if the people you do business with come to collect.”

“I wouldn’t let anything happen to you,” Shego insisted, making a fist. “And you said you believed that.”

“I believe you would try, but most of all, I do not want to be here for you to pick your work over me.”

Shego’s eyes went wild and she slashed at the air. “I would never!”

With a sigh, Kyoko shook her head. “You already do it every time you leave. You know I do not want you to go, you know you do need to go, but you leave any way. Obviously, your job is more important to you than I am.” The words stabbed Kyoko in the chest as she spoke them. Shego might not mean it that way, but that was how it came across.

“No,” Shego snarled and shook her head.

“You need to leave this life you have made for yourself before it is too late,” Kyoko stated, her eyes pleading with Shego to just listen to her and stay, but her voice ordered Shego to stay.

Shego made two fists, which popped with green plasma. Her body visibly shook. Kyoko was not sure what to make of this, but she had a feeling it was not a good thing.

“You know what?” Shego flexed her fingers while her voice actually shook. “You didn’t care about this when I was taking you out to all of the best restaurants. You didn’t care when I was buying all the best clothes and jewelry. You didn’t care when I bought you the car. You weren’t so scared then and don’t try to pretend like you didn’t know what the hell I was doing at the time. All of sudden I’m wrong for wanting the best for us? Like hell!” She was not going to accept that when everything was fine before.

“It was nice,” Kyoko admitted easily because that was the truth of the matter. “But, I would take you over all of those things, always, even back then. You do not need to impress me, darling. I would have stayed with you through your other job. I would have stayed with you in that rat infested apartment—” she tried to explain, but she was cut off.

“I didn’t want you to!” Shego pointed to herself with both hands. “You deserved better than that! _We_ deserved better than that. All that time I spent busting my ass for this city and I never got a damn thing for it! I deserve this!”

Kyoko nodded slowly, as if she finally understood it all. “That is at the heart of the matter, is it not? It is really what _you_ want.” She wondered if she looked as disappointed as she felt. It was never about them or her, but it was all about Shego. Perhaps Shego never actually loved her and she, their relationship, had always just been an excuse to do what she truly loved.

“Why can’t have what I want?” Shego demanded, glaring at her as if this was all her fault. “I’ve put in hard hours and got nothing in return, but kicked out of my damn home for loving a woman who suddenly wants to get on a high horse after I’ve given her everything a person could!”

Kyoko blinked. _Wow_. Those words shot through her and burned right through her heart. She almost sniffled, but held it in. She could not trust Shego with her tears now. 

“So, now it is my fault that you got kicked out as well?” Kyoko asked in a calm, but small voice. Her beloved blamed her for what happened between her brothers and now Shego thought she was being ungrateful. She doubted she could not feel any worse at the moment than if Shego did slap her.

Shego gasped and held up her hands in surrender. “I didn’t mean it that way!” She realized what she could end up talking herself into, or out of, namely her relationship. Maybe they meant something to her, after all, but clearly not enough. “Look, let’s just drop it, okay? This is what I do. It’s what got us where we are. It’s got us everything we want,” she defended her actions in a collected tone. She took a breath to compose herself to avoid saying something she might end up regretting.

Kyoko swallowed down a lump in her throat. “And that is why you should leave it all now. I do not know how deep you are in, but you should not go any deeper than what you have, so walk away. I would not know what to do if you were in jail or worse.” She could feel tears stinging her eyes. Perhaps she would not be able to avoid crying, but it might help Shego agree with her.

Emerald eyes glanced away. “I can’t just walk away.”

“Is it that you cannot or do not want to?” Kyoko’s voice was low, pained.

Shego was silent and Kyoko nodded. This was becoming so obvious to her that she feared it could cripple her. Three years of loving someone she thought was the best girl she had ever met and those three years were not worth Shego walking away from a dangerous, illegal activity. If only Shego just literally stabbed her in the heart. That would have been easier to deal with.

“What’s more important to you, Shego?” Kyoko asked in a stronger voice than she was feeling at the moment. Part of her was afraid the job was more important to Shego, but she held onto hope as best she could. 

“Doy! You, of course,” Shego answered.

“Then leave it,” Kyoko said firmly one more time. 

That time, Shego nodded, as if she agreed and with that the argument was over just like that. Shego returned to the bed, sitting next to the brush. Kyoko had to take a moment to realize Shego had actually picked her over the job.

“You gonna finish my hair?” Shego asked, smiling over her shoulder.

Kyoko nodded. “Of course.” She eased back into her space and took the brush from Shego. She cried a little as she started into Shego’s hair and embraced Shego from behind. “Thank you.” 

Shego put her hands on Kyoko’s and gave them a little squeeze. “Babe, I love you, okay? I love you.”

Kyoko sniffled and kissed Shego’s cheek. “I believe you. I love you, too.”

-8-8-8-8-

Shego could not believe they argued over her job. Kyoko actually seemed to think she would pick to job over her. How terrible was that? Of course her girl was more important to her than a job, even if that job was a career to her now and she had been doing excellent work she loved. Still, she loved Kyoko way more than anything else on the planet.

So, Shego stayed in with Kyoko, not just that night, but all the time now. Kyoko adored this and it showed in her expression alone. She showered Shego with attention and homemade meals, mostly Japanese foods because that was what Kyoko was accustomed to making for herself.

Shego did not complain. Truthfully, she enjoyed the attention, but sometimes zoned off. She stared blankly at walls or the floor. Sometimes, her mind was clearly elsewhere, even at crucial times. Her brain just easily wandered now while she tried to ignore that underlying itch, which became more and more bothersome and demanding as time went on. 

“Shego,” Kyoko huffed slightly.

“Hmm?” Shego replied, not really looking at her girlfriend as much as she looked through her.

“Are you going to make love to me or continue to daydream?” Kyoko inquired with a bit of a teasing smile, even though her self-esteem stung just a bit. She was on top of Shego and topless to make matters worse. Shego was not paying her any mind at all.

“Oh.” Shego blinked as if she was surprised with what was going on. She could not believe she had drifted mentally with her girl right on top of her. She turned her attention to Kyoko, even though at the back of her mind, she thought about how much she wanted to go out and break into some place with a complex security system. She liked the challenge and the thrill of success when she finally made it into some place. It would get rid of the damned itch she experienced every freaking day of her life for the past few weeks. 

Kyoko hated to think where Shego’s mind was. She often detested thinking about where Shego’s thoughts were. She did not want to think she actually lost her beloved to illegal activities. Shego had chosen her, she told herself. Shego would stay with her, she told herself. Shego would not go out and put them both at risk. Shego was not like that, but then what made her mind wander like that?

“Shego, are you still with me?” Kyoko inquired, rocking against Shego and earning a low whimper.

Shego’s response was to sit up and put her mouth to work on Kyoko’s skin. Kyoko whimpered and moaned. Shego did her best to forget about the itch under her skin by trying to turn Kyoko inside out in the most delicious of ways. She loved Kyoko. Kyoko deserved her attention. She would give Kyoko her everything right now.

-8-8-8-8-

“Darling,” Kyoko whispered, trying to catch her breath. She rested on top of Shego still, but she was now spent for the night. She would not be able to move and Shego did not want her to.

“Yes?” Shego caressed the small of her girl’s back. The feel of Kyoko’s skin was as amazing as ever and, yet, in the back of her mind, Shego thought about the other things her fingers could be doing, like cracking safes. 

“I am the only one for you, right?” Kyoko asked, her hands tucked into Shego’s ribs.

Shego’s brow furrowed. “Of course. Why would you ask?” 

“Well… because you zoned out on me right before we were about to make love. It seems a bit… odd,” Kyoko pointed out. She did not want to come right out and say she was now fearful Shego might be cheating on her, as it would explain why Shego did not seem interested in being intimate with her.

“I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to do that and you’re always going to be the only one for me. No other human being could take your place.”

Kyoko smiled; that was good to know. But, it did not explain why her beloved’s mind was not in the same room as they were more often than not, especially while they were supposed to be having sex. If Shego was not thinking of another person, then what was she thinking about?

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: the end.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own these characters and I don't own the song.

“ _I gotta get you outta the streets/ I disagree when you tell me that you’re doing it for me… I need you here with me…_ ” [Street Symphony, the remix](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nc3W4mfbtNo).

Choices 

The Conclusion

The night Kyoko woke up alone in bed, she tried not to think anything of it at first. She considered Shego might have just gotten up for something in the apartment and would be back. She even listened for the soft noises of Shego moving around. When she heard nothing, she still held onto the hope Shego was just in the condo somewhere, unable to sleep for whatever reason.

After a few minutes of waiting, she knew that was not the case. She frowned, but tried to tell herself it was not possible. There was no way her beloved would go out and do something dangerous after they had had an argument about it and reached an agreement. But, after a few more nights of such behavior, she figured Shego had gone back on their agreement.

At first, Kyoko wanted to sob, but she held it in. She allowed her anger to devour any sorrow with in her. Why should she cry over this? It obviously meant nothing to Shego, so why should she shed tears?

“Darling,” Kyoko said as Shego entered their bedroom after being absent for yet another night. She glared at Shego from her side of the bed.

“Kyoko!” Emerald eyes went wide and Shego gasped in surprise. She had not expected Kyoko to be awake obviously.

“Where have you been?” Kyoko inquired as if everything was fine when she was actually boiling over with rage. It did not even matter what Shego had done, whether she had gone out to “work” or had just gone out. The fact that she had done it in a sneaky manner made it seem like a betrayal because she obviously did not want Kyoko to know about it.

“You know, out,” Shego answered nonchalantly and with a shrug to boot. She was a bit shocked she had been busted, but she did not think anything of it. Surely, her girl would cut her a break after all they had been through, she reasoned. It was not like she had gone out and killed someone and it was not like she was out sleeping with other women. Surely, her girl would forgive her. She just needed to stop the itching.

“I thought you were not going to go ‘out’ anymore,” Kyoko stated, still speaking plainly, but her mood slipped in a bit.

“I couldn’t help it. We do need money to live,” Shego argued since she could tell her woman was just a tad upset with her.

“We have money to live,” Kyoko pointed out. They had more than enough money to last several lifetimes.

“Well, we need a steady income,” Shego countered. Silently, she begged this line of reasoning to work, even though she could already feel it failing.

“Shego, I really cannot do this,” Kyoko sighed, her shoulders slumping in defeat. She stayed up late, worrying about if Shego would come home now. And if she did come home, what kind of state she was going to be? What if she ran across some horrible people? What if she did business with people who betrayed her? It was scary just thinking about and she just could not take it anymore. If that was what Shego wanted, that was fine, but she did not want to be any part of it anymore.

Shego looked around the room and moved closer to the bed. “What are you saying?”

“I do not want to be up late all the time worrying if you are going to come in or not, thinking you might have been arrested or worse. I cannot take this stress. It’s nerve-wracking. I do not want to lose you,” Kyoko answered.

Shego hurried to her girl’s side and embraced her. Kyoko returned the hug with her own, holding on tightly to Shego. She really did not want to lose Shego. She loved Shego and appreciated everything Shego did and was doing for her, but she was scared for Shego and for herself actually. She did not know what kind of lowlifes Shego dealt with and what they might do to either of them if something went wrong. Yes, she knew Shego was strong, but Shego was still only one person and she could not be around all the time.

Beyond that, how was Kyoko supposed to trust Shego now? It was one thing to lie to her through omission, but this was something more. Shego said she would not do this anymore, but here she was, doing the same thing that troubled the relationship in the first place. It was like Shego had no regard for her or their relationship?

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you. I didn’t mean to make things hard on you,” Shego apologized. She did not mean to do what she was doing. She just wanted to be a good girlfriend and make sure they would have everything they wanted, needed, and deserved. She had no desire to hurt or scare Kyoko during the process.

“So, you will stop?” Kyoko asked in a small, hopeful voice. She was afraid Shego would give her another excuse as to why she could not stop and she knew it would be the final straw. She just could not take it anymore.

“I’ll stop,” Shego promised. Kyoko knew she should not believe her, but she wanted to believe Shego so badly.

Kyoko smiled and held on to Shego tighter. Shego smiled, too, and leaned in for a kiss. The touch of her lips felt true, so Kyoko returned the kiss. The embrace turned passionate, but loving.

-8-8-8-8-

So, it was settled, Shego was going to stop. _I can stop_ , Shego told herself. Kyoko believed she could stop and she would stop for Kyoko. Or that was what she told herself.

Just like when she quit before, Shego continued to think about stealing. She tried her best not to be distant when it came to Kyoko, especially if they were in bed. She did not want to run the risk of Kyoko assuming she was cheating on her or something just as ridiculous. She took the role of being the homemaker out of the pair of them since she really had nothing else to do with her time, giving Kyoko a chance to study more.

They even discussed Kyoko applying to Go University, or really any other university in the United States, for graduate school. They needed some excuse to get her to stay in the country since she was about to graduate. If Kyoko had to leave, though, Shego was prepared to pack up and go right with her. Her Japanese was just as good as Kyoko’s English. 

Everything seemed to be going smooth until some old clients contacted Shego while she was out grocery shopping of all things. They figured it was all right since Shego disliked setting things up over the phone, unless she and the other party involved were both on payphones. They had a job, a tantalizing job for the simple fact of where they wanted her to break into, which was high-security office building. They would not take no for an answer, needing the blueprints for some kind of high-tech weapon. It was something she had never done before, but she told herself she could not betray Kyoko’s trust again.

“She’ll never forgive me,” Shego muttered to herself, as she turned and walked off. _Kyoko will never forgive me and I love her and I love our relationship. Just keep walking_. They followed her, though, practically begging her to do this job.

She tried to insist that she was out of that life, but the fellows just kept offering her more and more money. It did not help matters she knew the place they wanted her to break into. She would love nothing more than to try. The place was supposed to have the best security system a building could have. At first, she walked away and just told them she did not do things like that anymore and they would need to find someone else. Her resolve did not last long.

She did a complete 180 and accepted when she wandered by an expensive jewelry store that very same day and saw a diamond necklace she just had to have for her beloved. It would be a magical graduation gift, but she did not want to steal it. She did not steal anything she gave her girl except for their first anniversary gift. She knew Kyoko would never want to have something ill gotten. She thought that one degree removed from the stolen item made gifts okay and Kyoko seemed to be fine with that.

A little evil voice in the back of her mind told Shego that the graduation gift was just an excuse to agree to the job. She had that same old itch that came up every time she quit stealing. She wanted the thrill she got from breaking into some place and making off with supposedly secure item. She missed that and wanted it back, if only for the night. Her lover would never know and she could just quit again. It was that simple to her.

-8-8-8-8-

Kyoko frowned and paced the living room as the night pressed on. She had come in from class and found Shego was not home, which she did not think anything on. After a few hours, she started to worry. She called Shego’s cell phone several times, but those calls were not answered. Ironically, Shego had recently bought the cell phone just so they could stay in touch and it was supposed to keep Kyoko from worrying about her. Kyoko hoped nothing happened to Shego and she did not know what to do, so she sat by the phone, hoping for a call.

The only time she left her seat was to use the bathroom. She even stayed up late that night, waiting, praying for a call from her beloved. She stared at the door, listening carefully for any sound just beyond it. There was just the stark, bleak silence, though.

She nodded off for a moment and when she woke up, she noted the light blinking on the phone. A message had been left. She played the message immediately, hoping it was Shego.

“Hey, baby, don’t get mad at me, but I need your help. I need you to go into our closet and go into a shoebox. You know which one I’m talking about and then I need you to… come bail me out… of jail,” Shego said into the voicemail. Her voice sounded ashamed and embarrassed.

“Jail?” Kyoko echoed. She frowned deeply, practically scowling.

She could not believe it. Shego had gone out and gotten arrested, just like she told her would happen. Shego had been up to her old tricks. So, the money was what she really wanted. It was never about them and she kept ignoring that.

Kyoko swallowed as it felt like her heart exploded in her chest. “Why do I have to love her so much? She clearly does not love me so.”

It was all about money and Shego obviously would never stop. In fact, she was just lying now. She pretty much lied right to Kyoko’s face, hugged her, and kissed her, thus betraying her and their entire relationship.

“I do not matter to her. Only the money matters,” Kyoko growled, hoping to drown out the burning in her throat.

She was angered and hurt by that realization. Shego had lied to her while looking her right in the eye. Okay, apparently, Shego would rather have money than have her. Fine, it could be that way then. She would not stick around for things to only get worse and for her to only get hurt again, maybe more than just emotionally. It was over.

“I will never let her hurt me again, never let her lie to me again,” Kyoko decided.

-8-8-8-8-

Shego was released from lockup after making bail. She could not believe she had let something as stupid as a silent alarm cause her problems. But, she supposed it was all right since her lover had come to bail her out. The odd thing was that Kyoko was not there to greet her upon her release. The car was there, but her girlfriend was not. It was weird and she waited around for a while, hoping Kyoko would be back. But, Kyoko never made an appearance.

Shego drove the car home and found the place silent and empty, which her body mimicked out of anxiety. Swallowing hard, she tried to squash down the anxiety. She rushed through the place and discovered some oddities, mostly that her beloved’s clothes were gone. Not the expensive clothing, but the clothes Kyoko wore daily, along with her shoes and her books.

“No, no, no,” Shego said and searched the apartment more thoroughly, hoping to whatever divinity there was in existence that her girl had not actually left her.

Everything for the most part was still in their home. None of Kyoko’s jewelry was missing, except for the golden triangle earrings she wore all the time from their first anniversary. Pretty much everything she had ever brought Kyoko since she started stealing was still there. And then she noticed the light flashing on the phone, telling her there was a message waiting. With a trembling hand, she played the message.

“Darling, it is quite clear to me you have no plans to let go of that life and I just cannot do this anymore. I cannot pretend I do not know what is going on. I cannot pretend it does not hurt when you leave me at night, especially after telling me you would not do this anymore. I will not allow you to lie to my face anymore. If that is the life you want, then it is yours, but I will not be a part of it. I wish you the best. I do still love you and may always love you, but I cannot be with you anymore,” Kyoko informed the voice mail.

Shego growled in anger and slapped the phone off of the nightstand, not caring if it broke. “How could she just leave like that?” she roared.

Worse yet, Kyoko did not tell Shego where she was, so Shego could not go after her. Added to that, she made it seem like it was all Shego’s fault. They could have talked things out like before. They could have done so many things, but instead Kyoko left the like the coward she always was.

“Fine,” Shego snarled. “Kyoko just wants to leave after all I’ve done for her? Fine! Go ahead and leave! I don’t give a damn!” She kicked over the dresser, watching her photo album clatter to the floor.

It landed on a picture of them hugged up in the Go University quad. Shego snarled as she snatched it up. She almost burned it in her hands, but scowled down at their youthful smiling faces. _Screw them_.

She would show Kyoko. She would continue on and just fine. She would wait Kyoko to realize her mistake and she would come back. She was sure Kyoko would come back. After all, no one would ever treat Kyoko the way she did. No one would ever treat Kyoko like a queen, so she would come back for that. She would… right?

-*-(Five years later)-*-

Kyoko worked late that night, still at her desk with a stack of paperwork. Her office glowed under the artificial light and the sound of pen scratching across the paper bounced off the wall. Occasionally, she moved from paper to the computer and typed responses to emails.

She needed to get things in order because Nakasumi-san had to make a speech for the grand opening of one of his new factories tomorrow. They would have to be on the plane early, too. She would look terrible when it was all said and done, but she did not really mind that.

She did not have anyone she needed to impress visually. She was pretty much married to her work and did not have time for a social life, not that she wanted one. She loved her career, as best anyone could love a job. Her attention was diverted from her papers as she heard a noise in the office across the hall, Nakasumi-san’s office. 

Kyoko rose from her desk to go see what was going on. She knew Nakasumi had left for the evening, wanting to prepare for tomorrow, so she was not sure who or what was in his office. She opened the door, causing light from the hallway to flood into the dark office, allowing her to see a figure clad in green and black sifting through the filing cabinet that was positioned against the wall in the rather large, lush office. She gasped and the figure faced her, making her gasp again.

“Shego?” Kyoko said, not believing her eyes, but there Shego was, standing only a few feet away from her.

“Kyoko?” Shego’s mouth fell open in shock. Of all the places Drakken had her heisting things from, Kyoko had to be here? What were the freaking odds? _Oh, man, Kyoko looks good_ , her mind immediately noted. That magenta mandarin-style shirt clung to her former woman in all of the right places. Aging had done her well. She still looked like such an angel.

“I would ask what are you doing here, but that is fairly obvious,” Kyoko remarked, trying her best to sound normal. The sight of Shego dredged up a lot of memories and emotions, all of them mixed. Her heart beat heavy against her ribs, hurting her chest. She did not know how to feel, even though the sight of her former lover confirmed something she had suspected since she left.

“It’s obvious for one of us. What are you doing here? Became a secretary and found yourself a sugar daddy?” Shego teased, smirking. The taunt hid the fact that she was hurt and embarrassed to see Kyoko, to have Kyoko walk in on her while she was working. There were so many nights she longed to hold that slender body in her arms in the past and she could barely remember what that experience even felt like because back then, even when she held Kyoko, her mind had been thinking about stealing. She still itched, but since Kyoko left, the itch had been for her.

“I am Nakasumi-san’s most trusted and valued assistant,” Kyoko declared, putting her chin in the air. It was an honorable job and allowed her to work in the business world, as she desired. This would open doors most could only imagine. She had fulfilled her dream and apparently, Shego was still doing the same old thing.

Shego rolled her eyes. “Big deal,” she muttered, trying to make light of the confident woman and the fact that she had found her niche in life.

“And I can see you’re still doing what you love. I always wondered why you flipped through dozens of papers almost everyday. And then I heard about you achieving international infamy, being wanted in eleven countries. You must be proud of yourself,” Kyoko commented, rolling her eyes.

“I am,” Shego stated soundly. Well, she had been until she saw Kyoko. Now, her life seemed so meaningless, like nothing she had mattered because something or someone was missing. Her heart felt like it was crushed in her chest just from looking at Kyoko. Whatever soul she had left withered the moment Kyoko caught her.

“That’s good. I suppose we never had any hope then, huh?” Kyoko muttered, thinking aloud more than anything else. Apparently, she never would have been able to compete with Shego’s “career.” So, it was the best thing that she left. The revelation coupled with the feeling Shego’s presence confirmed merely agonized her further. She did a good job of not showing the pain, though.

Shego was stunned by those words and they made her stomach flip. Did they really have no hope? She never thought that for a second when they were together, but she did not see the point in voicing that. It would be best if she let Kyoko think that since there was no chance of them ever being anything again.

“If you leave now, I will not call the police on you,” Kyoko stated. She was not even sure if she could call the police on Shego, but she needed to say something to get Shego out of the office and hopefully prevent her from stealing whatever it was she sought.

Shego smirked and decided to tease Kyoko again. “Aw, you still love me,” she quipped.

“I do,” Kyoko easily confessed, which stunned the hell out of the thief. That was what the sight of Shego had confirmed. She definitely still loved Shego with all of her heart and soul. She probably always would, so her career would have to be enough for her. “I love the you that you once were before the money was everything and the only thing that you wanted.”

Shego scoffed loudly. “You loved the hero I used to be. That’s what mattered to you.” It was never about loving her, but having a hero that could protect Kyoko, she was willing to bet.

“You know that is not true! I already told you, I would have stayed with you through every hardship you ever faced, not just the low paying job or the small apartment, but everything! But, you lied to me, twice. I forgave you and you lied again, as if I did not matter. You betrayed my trust and proved I did not matter to you in the slightest. The only thing you cared about was money. I was just an excuse for you to use,” Kyoko shot back. 

“You mattered to me!” Shego blurted out because of the heat of the moment. Damn, she really wish she could take that back. But, then again, she wished she could take a lot of things back when it came to Kyoko. Being without Kyoko itched more than not being able to break and enter did.

“You had a funny way of showing it,” Kyoko remarked with venom in her voice, venom that she felt bubbling in every inch of her. God, how she wished Shego had shown her back then that she mattered instead of lying to her so many times. She would have stayed if that were the case.

Shego did not miss a beat and regained her composure, at least outwardly. “It went with your funny way of appreciating it, running away without even bothering to talk it out.”

“I did not want to be lied to again,” Kyoko huffed. Lying seemed to be the only thing Shego did when talking to her back then.

“You shouldn’t have asked then,” Shego said with disdain in her voice, as if that made any sense. She folded her arms across her chest and scowled.

Kyoko shook her head and then wrapped her arms around herself. “That is no way to have a relationship. We used to be open and honest with each other. We used to be able to tell each other everything and then suddenly I was not supposed to ask and you would lie if I did? That is no way to behave, especially toward a lover.”

Shego was stuck. How could she debate against that? Their relationship had been closed off once she started being secretive. She used to be able to tell Kyoko everything under the sun about her, but when she became a thief that all stopped. She was not able to talk about anything because she had been fearful she would lose Kyoko and that happened anyway. _Smooth move, loser_ , her brain commented. She had lost the most precious thing in the world to her and she was so stupid she only just now realized it completely; or at least, she just now acknowledged it.

“Kyoko…” Shego wanted to say something, but she was not sure what. Taking a breath, she swallowed down a lump in her throat that she knew was utter despair and loss. “I… I just wanted to make you happy.” She sniffled. It had been many years since she cried and she feared she might do it now, in front of the reason she had last cried.

“As I constantly told you back then, when you never listened to me, I was happy and I wished you had just been able to keep your word. I would have been happy with you, Shego, if only you had kept your word. But, now we are where we are. So, like I said, if you leave now, I will not call the police,” Kyoko stated plainly. She kept her arms around herself, feeling like the position was the only thing keeping her from falling apart. 

Shego inhaled deeply, wanting to compose herself more. It was impossible. She had practically shattered into herself and she was not sure she would ever be whole again. She just did not want Kyoko to know that.

“What if I just take you along with what I came here for?” Shego proposed with a sinister smirk. Too bad her voice cracked in between the question.

Kyoko glanced away and sighed loudly. “What good would that do us?” She turned back and glowered at Shego. “You would take me to your lair, tie me up, and ravish me for the rest of our lives? How could that fix what has been broken? Do you think that would make me want to be with you again? Do you think that would even be close to a substitute of what we had? Would that make you happy?” Kyoko hissed, sounding insulted and quite angry. How dare Shego even joke about doing such a thing to her after what they had in the past? After they had been so close and so in love? How dare she even think such a thing after what they had?

“Kyoko…” Shego reached out for Kyoko and then dropped her hand to the side.

Shego was not sure what to say. She wished there were words to get Kyoko to give her one more chance right now. She would actually leave it all behind this time and never look back. Kyoko had been the one thing in her life that gave it meaning. She wished she could bring herself to say those words and that her former lover would believe them and they could be together again, but she knew that such a thing would never happen. Kyoko probably would never believe any words that came out of her mouth now. No, she had ruined that trust in the past and it would never come back.

“Just leave, Shego. Make this easier on the both of us this one time,” Kyoko pled, tears starting to well in her eyes at the sight of the woman she knew she still loved with all of her heart and she probably always would. She wished they could go back and do it all over again with the knowledge they had now. Maybe they would have been able to save their relationship or maybe they were just doomed to fail. She would never know. 

Shego doubted she would ever feel as low in all her life as she did at that very moment. And instead of prolonging the agonizing moment for the sake of seeing the one woman on the planet she loved just a little longer, she obeyed Kyoko. If only she could have done that all those years ago, they both mentally commented.

Now, it was too late for them. There was no “them” and there never would be. There was only a past, a fading photo album locked in a safe deposit box. In that past, a teenage Kyoko and Shego loved each other and they smiled together while holding each other tenderly and telling each other everything, their hopes, their dreams, and how they would have a future together. In the present, a grown Kyoko and Shego loved each other and agonized over it, separately, never to be together again. The future was a dark place of loneliness and despair with only work to comfort them.

-8-8-8-8-

The End.

Thank you all for reading. I hope you enjoyed the story. If so, please, check out some of my other works. You can also catch me on Facebook under [SL Kassidy](https://www.facebook.com/SL-Kassidy-482097488469386/). For now, I'm returning to my padded room. Hopefully, I'll be back and so will you. Thanks again. I appreciate the support.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you wanna see more of my fanfics, they're all at FFN under [StarvingLunatic](https://www.fanfiction.net/~starvinglunatic). If you wanna see some original stories, you can look at FP under [StarvingLunatic](https://www.fictionpress.com/u/576301/).


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